Building a healthier body image through mindfulness
My mom had just bought me a two-piece bathing suit. It was light purple with yellow flowers and I loved it. I put it on, turned on the sprinklers, and ran outside in the front yard. I remember feeling compelled to hug my stomach to hide it from people who might come by our yard in fear that they would be disgusted by my body. Especially the boy down the street…what would he think if he saw me?
I was six years old.
For many of us, the words “body image” may invoke unpleasant memories, uncomfortable emotions, physical sensations, or negative thoughts about ourselves. From infancy, we are bombarded with messages and images, both from our micro and macro environments, outlining a “perfect” body. If we do not match the “perfect” body, then there must be something wrong with us, something that needs to be changed. We may be inclined to try multiple fad diets, buy products, or even get plastic surgery to alter our looks to match what we think is the ideal body. We may experience relentless thoughts of self-hatred and disgust. All the while, our body is sitting in the corner like a child in time-out asking us “but what did I do wrong?”.
Your body nor mind have done nothing wrong. Your mind has simply digested information from your environment and taken learned messages as the “truth” of your experience. The problem is that the only truth is that you are a human being having an experience. Everything else added to that is perception. The first step for many in exploring how to have a healthy body image is to practice compassionate self-forgiveness in “falling for” the messages that we may have received related to our body not being acceptable. We can explore and examine all the messages we have received from our environment and say to ourselves “I forgive myself for falling for the belief that my body is not good enough”. This is not an easy process; but with consistent practice and support, can lead to the unlearning of these hurtful messages. And it can be incredibly helpful to have therapeutic support in this process.
In addition to compassionate self-forgiveness, mindfulness can have a positive impact on body image and self-esteem (Albertson, Neff, and Dill-Shackleford, 2014; Stewart, 2004). Jon Kabat-Zinn, founder of Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.” Mindfulness-based practices teach us to become observers of our experience rather than becoming the experience itself. As in we are not our thoughts, feelings, sensations; we are the experiencer of our thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Mindfulness-based practices like meditation, yoga, body scans, etc. teach us to observe our thoughts, emotions, and sensations with a curious and compassionate attitude. These practices aid us in practicing non-attachment and non-identification toward our experience. So when our mind experiences a negative thought about our body, we can identify it for exactly what it is: a thought. And we can remind ourselves that thoughts are not facts nor do they define who we are.
Here’s an example of what utilizing mindfulness may look like:
“My nose is too big. I’m ugly. People probably think I’m ugly too.”
How could we mindfully approach these thoughts?
“That’s interesting that I’m experiencing a thought about my nose being too big and that I’m ugly. These thoughts are hurtful and are not helping me. I forgive myself for falling for the belief that my face is ugly. I can choose not to identify with this thought and choose a more adaptive belief that I am good enough as I am”.
When one consistently practices this level of awareness and non-identification, one can begin changing their perception of themselves and their environment, leading to a healthier and more truthful view of the human experience. I know this to be true not only from research and my experience as a counselor, but also as a fellow human being who struggled with body image issues for most of my life. Mindfulness has helped me accept and love my body exactly as it is. With my mind focusing less on negative thoughts about my body, it has the space and freedom to focus on what I deeply care about: my passions, my loved ones, and my clients.
If you would like to experience how meditation can impact our body image, I invite you to listen to my Body Scan meditation here.
If you are interested in how holistic psychotherapy can support you in building a healthier body image, I offer complimentary 15-minute phone consultations for prospective clients to see if Wildwood Counseling would be a good fit for their needs. Consultations can be booked here.
*It is important to note that this piece of writing pertains mainly to a cisgender experience of body image issues and may not be congruent with a transgender or non-binary experience of body image issues. For more information and support related to this, please see resources below:
References:
Albertson, E. R., Neff, K. D., & Dill-Shackleford, K. E. (2014). Self-Compassion and Body Dissatisfaction in Women: A randomized controlled trial of a brief meditation intervention. doi:10.1007/s12671-014-0277-3
Stewart, T. M. (2004). Light on Body Image Treatment: Acceptance through mindfulness. Behavior Modification, 28(6), 783-811. doi:10.1177/0145445503259862